Today it felt like I pulled out of the funk I was in. My mind felt clear for the first time since all this started. I was chipper all day. Happy. Clear headed. Thank God! All the glum was getting boring. Not that all this "clarity" helped me make a decision any faster, but it helped my spirit anyhow. I felt uplifted and it felt good. 9 days is way to long to feel down, unclear, detached, nonchalant. I LIKE caring about things. It's what I do -- I CARE. A LOT. About EVERYONE and, usually, EVERY THING. I drove into work today and it was like I hadn't heard music in ages. All the songs that are played out, the ones you hear every morning at the same time of the morning, the ones that I would normally change the station on -- I listened to. I liked them. It didn't matter how old or played out the song was, I was groovin. It feels like it's been forever since I've been me. I'm starting to feel like me.
Mom went back home today. We dropped her off about 2 hours ago. I'm SO happy she came out. It's always better, and easier, when mom is there to help. Just like when you're little and you want your mom -- same thing. I don't think I will ever grow out of it. She's coming back around surgery time if she can. I just need to give her a date.
I was happy today, and it's been a good day (aside from the attack from my seasonal allergies). I still thought a lot about the decision before me, but today - it all didn't seem so heavy. I hope as we keep going forward, things continue this way. I know it's a long road - but for today - it's a good day.
"I didn't even have to use my AK. Today was a good day." LOL =D